The Road to Cardinal

Characters
Rowan: 15 years old boy who lives with his parents. He has 20 years old brother and a 30-years-old sister.
Lupin: 20 years old Rowan’s older brother and Lilac’s younger brother. A professional wheelchair basketball player. Almost every day he practices for the games and visits schools and other facilities to give demonstrations to spread that sport. He was born in Cardinal and moved to Laila when he was 8. After graduation from junior high, he moved to Cardinal again to be a member of the national team. He is good at painting.
Lilac: 30 years old Rowan and Lupin’s older sister who works and lives in Cardinal.
Lily: Lilac, Lupin, and Rowan’s mother who had worked for a publishing company.
Jan: Lily’s former husband passed away about 20 years ago. A part-time artist. On weekdays he worked for a company.

Hamal: Jan’s best friend, a part-time artist.
Capella: Hamal’s partner, a photographer.
Mary: Friend of Jan, Lily, Capella, and Hamal. An architect and designed the gallery. Capella’s former classmate.

He entered his room. Just before this, he was told by his mother to clean up his room. New Year’s Eve was coming.

It wasn’t in a mess; except the book shelf. He picked up one of the books from the shelf and opened it. It was Real, his brother’s favorite, and his brother had given it to him when he left this house to play on a big court as a professional wheelchair basketball player.

Rowan was 15, and he had 20 year-old brother Lupin, and 30 year-old sister Lilac. Three or four times a year, Rowan went to watch his brother’s play, and after the games, he met up with Lupin and Lilac. Both have been living in Cardinal, one of the biggest cities in the country.

Around the end of the year, his parents were so busy because many people held a year-end party. Their bar was crowded as usual, so he spent time alone in the second floor of his house. He was getting bored. He had already read all the books in his room and cleaned up everywhere. The faces of his sister and brother came up on his mind. They always said that he could call them whenever he wanted, but he knew that they were as busy as his parents who worked at the bottom of stairs.

He thrown himself down on the floor. There was nothing to do. Then he woke up and walked around, looked through everywhere and finally found a file. He knew that his father liked keeping everything tidy. He always put papers into files and wrote the titles down on the backbone of files. However, there were no titles nor any other information on it. He wondered why, then pulled it from the shelf. When he opened it, he saw yellowing papers in it. It might have been written by his sister, he realized, because he had read letters from her for many times. I should not read this, he thought, but could not stop his hand turning the pages.

After reading that paper, a feeling of meaninglessness filled his mind. It had remained somewhere in the back of his mind. It was the thing he had tried not to think of. He went back to his room and shut the door. Then he pushed his brother’s favorite comic to one side of the room and fell asleep.

New Year’s Day brought his sister and brother to his house. She was with her future husband who have lived with her for about four years. It was longer than the time he spent with her in the same house. He and his family had lived in Cardinal for three years. He was so young that couldn’t remember, therefore his family told him about their life in that city. His sister and brother had grown up there and after he was born, his parents decided to move to Laila, not as big as Cardinal, but cozy enough city. When his sister entered the university, his family moved away except for her. At that time, he was just three. This was the reason why he could not remember anything about that and it became a mecca for him.

His family passed their time individually: his brother, Lupin was in a small room next to his bedroom and drawing some pictures, his father and sister’s future husband were cooking for the New Year’s Eve dinner, his mother was shopping for supper, and he and his sister were sitting on a sofa in the living room. Nobody else cared about what he and his sister were doing, so it was a great opportunity for him to ask questions which had come up on his mind when he saw the yellowing paper. He took a deep breath, as if he were in front of a stern person who would judge him. There was the silence of the grave. After a few minutes, his sister broke that.

‘You have something on your mind, don’t you?’

She was a kind of person who always struck at the heart of the matter. He knew that her sensitivity had saved him and his brother for many times, and he thought this time would be the same.

‘I found this while I was cleaning up the living room. It was on dad’s cabinet.’ He saw his sister’s eyes open wide when her eyes caught the letters on that paper.

‘What’s this? The word “contract” is written on it. Why does dad have a contract? It says that dad should pay for my brother until he becomes a grown-up. I think . . . it is a duty for parents, so it shouldn’t be written on that kind of paper. You wrote this and pressed dad to sign, right?’ He asked with confidence, barely pausing for a breath; however, she didn’t answer.
‘Where did I come from?’ Another silence covered them.

‘You mean. . .’
‘I’ve never heard anything about the past,’ said Rowan.
‘So, you want to know everything?’ Lilac asked, and Rowan nodded.
‘Then, we should go to Cardinal. I cannot tell you without that city.’ Lilac said calmly. Then she stood up and entered the room where his brother was.
‘I have something to tell you, Lupin,’ she said.
‘Wait a minute,’ replied Lupin.
‘We can’t.’ Lilac said softly.

After a few seconds, Lupin looked up and seemed to find she was with his brother.
‘Rowan wants to know about the past. I’ll take him to somewhere related to “him” and —.’
‘I’ll go, too.’ Lupin said calmly as if it was a matter of course.
The next day, Rowan was on a train from Laila bound for Cardinal with his sister and brother. It took about three hours, so Lilac started telling him about Jan and his mother.

***

Lily and Jan married thirty-three years ago. Two years later, I, Lilac was born. Mother worked for a publishing house and continued working after she gave birth. Father was kind of a part-time artist. On weekdays, he worked as an employee of a company, and on weekends, he spent much time on drawing and painting in his room. I loved watching him bringing his face close to the canvas and propelling brushes. He sometimes took me to the park near our house. I played with the boy who I met there, and father walked here and there, and made sketches of everything: sky, flowers, trees, insects, chairs, and so on. He even drew me and my friend.

When I was ten, Lupin was born. It was a beautiful rainy day. The sound of falling rain filled my ears and the leaves of trees were trembling the drops as if beckoning someone. At that time, father was not in very good shape. As Lupin grew up, father’s condition got worse and started entering and leaving a hospital frequently. I was just ten. Even though I might have grown up physically and was an older sister of Lupin, my way of thinking was still immature. At same time or other, going to hospital to see father after school became my daily task. Mother was always busy, so I went to the kindergarten to meet Lupin and went to the hospital together.

Every time he smiled at me and said ‘Welcome, Lilac,’ when I entered his room. He was always calm. Always drawing small pictures. I couldn’t see him suffering from pain. Although our parents didn’t say anything, I somehow realized that his time was not so long.

Just after cerebrated the Lupin’s first birthday, father breathed his last. It was like he was falling asleep. He left his thirty years old wife, daughter, and son. I’d never seen mother’s tears even in the funeral. She hugged and kissed me when sadness filled my mind.

Mother decided to raise her children by herself. Four years had passed since Jan passed away. I was a seventh grade student and Lupin was five years old. Every day we had breakfast together, each of us prepare for work, school and kindergarten, and just before mother went to work, we, the children left home. I took Lupin to kindergarten and then went to school. After class, I stayed at the classroom to study and do homework for several hours, and after that I went to the kindergarten. Lupin told me what he did there with his friends as we walked back to our home. It became my new daily task.

The announcement said that they reached Cardinal, the last station of that train. People started moving and that made Rowan separated from the story. His brother, Lupin, clasped his hand to get off the train. He could hear that his brother was telling something to his sister, Lilac. Lupin might be concerning her and telling her to take rest because she looked tired, he thought. They got on a bus and travelled for ten minutes. After alighting that, he arrived at the peaceful place. There can be no mistake that this place was Cardinal, his longing city. But it was somehow different from the impression he felt before. It was cozier and more silent.

Lilac said that it would take twenty minutes to reach the place she wanted to visit with him. As they walked, his sister turned the pages of the story in her mind.

One day, our mother told Lupin to stay at the neighbor’s house. There were our father’s friend, Hamal, his partner and their three sons. He was a part-time artist, too. His partner, Capella was a photographer, and both worked with father to build a joint gallery. Father was infatuated with Hamal’s art works when he saw that for the first time, and that was the start of their friendship. We were in a good relationship even though our father wasn’t with us. They were so kind to us. I wanted to spend time together in their house, but mother told me to get into her car and drove for several minutes. We arrived at the restaurant. My brain worked hard to think of, and many doubts came up on my mind. I knew that I had noticed what was happening even though I didn’t want to.

A man was at the entrance. When we came into his view, he turned toward us. I didn’t know who he was, but I felt that there’s some connection between mother and this man. His age was almost the same as mother, or younger. I knew that they were in a special relationship. He asked me some questions. I didn’t want to talk with him, so I maintained my cautious attitude and kept thinking of Lupin. I wanted to spend time with them. I couldn’t understand why I was in the restaurant and having dinner with a stranger. I felt mother was concerning me, looked at me with anxiety, and tried to make the atmosphere more comfortable, however, the deathlike hush covered us. Although I knew that he is a great man who might become a great father, our father, Jan was the best for me and Lupin. I didn’t want anybody to be our new father. On the other hand, there was another kind of feeling in my mind. It was kind a happiness or ease. It was not the feeling about me or Lupin but mother.

I had overheard my parents talking about their future in the hospital room. I was nearly entering the room, but I stopped just before opening the door, so I could listen to their conversation peeping through a crack in it. Father said that he wanted mother to get married with someone else after his death. When he told her about his last wish, she shook her head. Although it was more than she could promise, father didn’t change his mind. He even pointed out that it would be too hard for her to rise two children all by herself. He closed his words with telling that ‘It’s our last promise.’
On the way back to our friends’ house, there was another silence which was different from that uncomfortable one at the restaurant. Just before I pushed a doorbell, mother took my hand. I looked up at her face and that made me surprised because she looked disturbed.

‘I was glad to know you found a person you love. Father would say so, too.’ I said. ‘He looked so gentle. Lupin might like him.’
‘How about you? I want to know what you think.’
‘I’m not sure. I mean…I know it’s good for you to have a new husband. It’s also good for Lupin to have a father because he doesn’t remember his father. Anyway, don’t worry about me. I’m OK.’
‘Please let me know what you think when you find some closure, even if it’s opposition or blame.’

Just then the door was opened by father’s best friend, Hamal. He smiled to me and let us in. Mother said that she had something to tell him, so I decided to wait for her with my brother. Hamal called his partner Capella who was playing a card game with Lupin and their children. After Capella went out, they restarted playing the game, so I joined.

Few weeks later, on Saturday, mother’s boyfriend came to the park near our house when we were there. He watched Lupin playing in the field with other children. Lupin picked up a flower and came to show it to his mother. When he reached her, he noticed that the stranger was with her. He saw my face, then ran toward me, sitting nearby chair.

‘I found this.’
‘Good. Is this for your mom?’ He nodded and glance at his mom. She was turning her eyes on her son, and their eyes met for a moment. Then he turned to me and handed the flower and said, ‘It’s yours.’
I knew that getting used to being with mother’s boyfriend was good for Lupin.
‘Don’t you remember him?’ I asked.
‘No.’ He answered.
‘You’ve met him last week. We have taken important steps for mother’s boyfriend and Lupin to be in a good relationship. However, it didn’t go well. Now I understand that my feeling affected Lupin, but at that time, I believed that it was the best way for him even if I couldn’t trust her boyfriend at all.

The time we spend together was gradually getting longer and longer. He sometimes came to our house and had dinner together. One day mother called me after Lupin fell asleep. Mother looked like a woman who had just come out from a grave. She said that she had something to tell me, and the thing she was going to say seemed important. But she looked she was in two minds about whether to tell me or not. Then she broke the silence.

‘What do you think if there’s a baby…I mean, me and his….’
‘You mean you’ll have that?’ She nodded.
‘Congratulations. We should have a party to celebrate this wonderful news. Does he know that? I’ll call him to invite. Lupin will be surprised to hear that, too.’

I went out the living room and shut the door. The words I told her were true, I love my younger brother Lupin and I might love that baby, too. On the other hand, I couldn’t understand why mother decided to have a baby before Lupin and her boyfriend build a good relationship. Other idea came up on my mind. Who would pay for Lupin’s education, life and others? He wasn’t a son of her boyfriend. There was no blood relationship.

After several month, the baby was born and Lupin named him Rowan. It was a beautiful autumn day, so we woke up earlier than usual to walk around our house for a while before going to the hospital. There were mountain ash trees and there were red small berries on the brunches. He picked one of them up.

‘Present for a baby.’ He said.
‘He’ll like it,’ said I.

The hospital was near the place my father had spent his last.

‘Do you remember your father?’ I asked. Lupin shook his head.
I wanted Lupin to know his father, so I took him to the gallery that our father and his friend, Hamal made. It was designed by Mary who introduced by Capella, Hamal’s partner. Mary was Capella’s former classmate and started working as an architect after graduation. Our father, Hamal, Capella and Mary discussed about the gallery for many times. Our mother also supported them. At the same time, our father and Hamal started drawing the joint work to display in the exhibition room. It was the first time and the last time for them to collaborate.

A party of three arrived at the plastered building.
‘Is this the gallery that you told me?’ Rowan asked and Lilac nodded.
Hamal was in that building. Rowan had met him for several times when he came to Cardinal to watch Lupin’s wheelchair basketball games. He was always with his partner, Capella, but on that day, he was not there.

‘Actually, you had come here before,’ said Lilac.
‘I can’t remember. When?’
‘You were a baby at that time. Just after you were born, our mother took you here. Is that right, Hamal?’
‘Yes. I do remember that. Your mother came here with you. She might have wanted to show you to her former husband.’ Hamal was thinking about the good days.
‘Can I see his works?’ Rowan asked to Hamal and Lilac.
‘Sure.’

Rowan reached the entrance. There was a passage from the entrance to the exhibition room. The wall, the ceiling, and the floor of the narrow passage were plastered. There were three boards and a picture panel on the wall. These boards were filled with introductions of two artists and this gallery. The picture might had taken in front of the gallery. Hamal and a man who sat on a wheelchair – he might be Jan, Rowan’s sister and brother’s father were in the center of the picture, and Rowan’s mother was next to her former husband, holding a baby in her arms. There were also some people who Rowan had met before.

Rowan moved toward the end of the passage and entered the exhibition room. When he reached there, the artwork unfolded before his eyes. He felt that he was sent to another world or he was the only person separated from the real world. That was Jan and Hamal’s joint work. Jan’s miniature and Hamal’s abstract paintings harmonized mysteriously. That was absolutely in his mind, but he couldn’t find the right word to express his feeling. It seemed that every word was too platitude to express the art work and what he felt.

The artist who had passed away 20 years ago was still living in this room, he realized. He couldn’t tell why, just felt like that. He walked toward that painting and saw its detail.

The next room was filled with Jan’s artworks and the pictures which had taken while he was at work on drawings. His artworks were exhibited in chronological order. It started with his childhood and ended with the very late in his life. All his late works were small that fitted on the palm of Rowan’s hands. Some of them were drawn on the tiny pieces of papers.
‘He continued drawing in the hospital. We couldn’t carry the canvas there, so he used the small papers.’ Lilac said suddenly.

***

Three siblings left the gallery and rode the train again.
‘Then, when and why the contract was written?’ Rowan asked. He learned about his brother and sister’s father, however, his sister had never said about the contract. It was the start of their short trip to Cardinal.

‘When your parents, Lupin and you moved to Laila, I was worried about Lupin because I could not be with him anymore. I thought … now I know it was useless worry, but at that time, I thought your father wouldn’t treat Lupin with love and pay for his education and his life.’
‘It was completely useless.’ Said Lupin with laughing.
‘Yes, I didn’t have to worry about that. But I wanted to make sure he would rise Lupin with loving care until he graduated from high school. this is the reason why I wrote that contract and forced him to sigh his name. It seemed that it was the only way to protect Lupin.’

They went back to their parents’ house. Lilac told Rowan that she would stay for several days. Lupin entered the room and restarted his drawing. He was a part-time painter, too.

In the evening, Rowan noticed that his sister went downstairs and entered his father’s bar. He followed her secretly. He wanted to know what they talk.

‘Here you are.’ His father put the glass with red liquid in front of her.
‘I told him everything.’
‘Every time we burden you a heavy rule.’
‘It’s okay, because that’s my duty. But we didn’t need the contract. I mean, you were …’
‘No, that remined me the responsibility of being their father. I couldn’t become your father, but I think I’m a good father of boys.’
‘Thanks, father.’ Lilac smiled.

Rowan saw Lilac drank the cocktail and went out the bar. His father was left alone and then resumed his work.
A man entered the bar and sat on the chair which Lilac had sat on just before that. Rowan could not stop watching the man carefully. He couldn’t help feeling that he had seen the man before in a picture. (3618 words)